A Body: Deconstruction

Reader discretion is advised, as the content may be triggering.

Scrape. 

Sc r ape

the shovel claws at my insides, 

flecks of skin breaking

up and pulling apart

the hollow hole where

sensation used to live is

dulled, uprooted, 

 

His shovel hits over and over again. Moving up and down. Striking. The impenetrable wall only holds for so long. Soiled, soily, dirty flesh appendages falling off, out, apart, anything, anywhere but where it should be — the changes, everything since then. 

 

A coffin,

a grave, a 

hollow hole for where

used to live

the complete feeling unfeeling

 

Something and nothing all over again — the changes, ever since then. Contorting, squeezing into small holes, apologising for something … soiled, dirty. Appendages falling apart. 

 

Scraping, s c r aping

his shovel hits the wooden cage

that protected me,

 

kept me contained in this space.

 

Everything changed since then — 

small shapes contorting into smaller spaces

 

It breaks me up. Over and over, bits and pieces everywhere, the complete unfeeling feeling replacing where the sensation used to live, a hollow hole that used to be the space for me, a space for breathing, but now the soiled, dirty appendages are there, deconstructed. 

 

A dull buzzing frizzes static, 

A strummed string, 

taut and floppy, 

unclean, soiled, dirty, broken up, 

A hollow hole,

 

The scraping against the wooden walls reverberates across my skin, scrawling and wriggling against the soil, the place that holds me, appendages uprooted and soiled, dirty, soily. It strikes again, again, and again. Quivering in the place it shouldn’t.

 

Something has changed. Filled up, and destroyed,

uprooted, hacked from the bottom, 

from the source, the faucet, 

 

Again. Again. Again. Again. It strikes, the shovel destroying the dirt, disconnecting the top from bottom, separating and scraping the layers of skin, pulling with teeth and metal, churning at the appendages as they uproot, execute — changes, ever since then.

 

a space that where sensation used to reside, 

used for breathing,

for giving, for taking,

His shovel taking more and more

Than he was owed.